fresh start

its silly if you really think about it;

i spent the past hour trying to figure out old e-mail accounts, passwords & secret questions in order to figure out a name for this blog. every name that i could think of & wanted was taken, causing me more grief & frustration (after telling a friend what i finally decided upon their reactions: "took you long enough"). then i realized in the past 22 years of my life, i've probably gone through way too many e-mail addresses, screennames & passwords that i cannot remember for the life of me. and now i ask myself: why did i keep switching them? i wish i could've realized how simple it would have made my life now to stay constant & not be so wishy-washy. but then that got me thinking: what is in a name.

when i was younger, i always wondered how my parents named me: eunice young park. my mom told me she originally wanted make my korean name byul (star in english). thinking about it now, i know i would have been a much different person today than i am now if they actually carried through with that name; thank God they didn't. honestly, i have no idea what my korean name means. something that has to do with a flower. or something. who knows.

eu⋅nice

latinized form of eunike (greek); eu:well, good, fair; nike: victory

my name reflects my personality very well. or my personality reflects my name very well. whichever, whatever. either way, i remember i used to hate my name. people would always misspell & mispronounce it. no one had the same name (except for the character in street car named desire - of course when we read that in highschool i always had to read that part). it wasn't until middle school that i met someone who had the same first name. and this year is the first time i met another person named eunice park. bizarre.

not going to lie, i don't remember where i was going with this. i don't even know why i'm writing about it. if you have read down to this part, congratulations! you have successfully followed a normal train-of-thought of mine. the best word to describe me: random. and now you know why.

i guess this is a fresh start to blogging & writing for me. i tried to keep a journal for the longest time but the last time i wrote in it was literally last year (my last entry was my new years resolution for 2009). one side of me hopes that no one ends up stumbling on to this page. and if you do, i'm sorry that you wasted 2 minutes of your time with my randomness. or maybe you were blessed. i'd like to think of it the latter.

its 3:30am & i have a doctors appointment at 11:30. lets see what time i sleep & if i can wake up in time for it.